Be Patience Find what you looking for

Well, how does a parent become patience when trying to help your child with some Activities? I had to keep praying for myself. Then a light went on in my head I was never patience for anything I threw a tantrum every time it took to long to get what I wanted. So did I leave before the miracle happen due to me being impatience?  Yes, as I look back by waiting a little longer there could have been a miracle.   But, no I was to busy throwing tantrum to realized and say wait lets see what happen. One thing I did have patience for is the type of guy I wanted to marry. When I was in relationships if by 2 years everything was not mentally check off I would dump that person. I knew for some reason that is not what I wanted as far as a relationship. 

Like Run-DMC said, "if you find you don't like my ways Well, you can send me back in 30 days".

            I would sent them packing in less than 24 mos. I am glad I had patience for that because I see women my age still have the drama you go thru when you start  relationships. Things like hanging out in the streets, arguing, cheating on each other, ect. Who would want to be in sum stuff like that? One day I was at the doctors office  this woman was on the phone with some guy telling him
"Oh you going to stay with her well I about to hang up the phone".   She said that about several different times and she was older than me. I said to myself hell to the naw. I am so glad I had the patience to find what I need in a man. If I did not I would have been doing the same thing the woman at the doctor's office was doing. She was not being patience for the man of her dreams. Instead she got the first thing she saw.

I often asked women why they continue to stay in dysfunctional relationship I had gotten 3 different answers. One stated all men cheat why get into another relationship when the same thing gonna happen in the last one besides why should she start over. The second one stated she liked guys with nothing so she can boss them around because they do not have anywhere else to go. The final one takes the cake for me she only wants to have one baby daddy that is why all of them are in dysfunctional relationships. All 3 of these ladies are miserable and lost themselves in the process.  Why do you want to be  with someone who is with you for shelter, food and clothes?   Maybe we as women shoud stand and not longer accept be there door mat. 

Going Foward

Well these pass couple of months have been working on me. The things I have been doing for self improvement. I went back to school, stop smoking, and started running. Just those 3 things gave me inner peace also not allowing people to knock me off my square. As a matter of fact they seen my "New Attitude" and they change there's. I guess people see that I have a more pleasant persona than before. Self driven to finish or continue things I start this year.  I want to find a career that makes me happy I have gotten a few job offers but I know I can find something better.  I loved my last job but the company went to another state.  I am going to continue to become postive.

Start over with A Purpose

  
     Many times we often think our mate is always the problem.  When in fact we get into another relationship you still have the same problem.  It never dawn on us that it could be me?  That is why you should have a list of quality you want in your mate, if they don't fit the quality do not bother.  You have to work on self-improvement.  How you do that first take an inventory of your pros and cons.   We all have a purpose in life.  What is my purpose?   To be honest I do not know but God knows.  When I start to follow God's path he had designed for me then I will know.  To discover my purpose I must turn to God's word and not the world's wisdom. I have not followed the Almighty in years but I know he is there by my side at all times.

     When we remove ourselves from a situation, try to fix the damage that was do us whether it’s self-infliction or not.  We must always do a personal inventory and throw away the bullshit.  Now you can walk as a victim or as a victor. If you walk like a victim you will be in the same situation as before maybe even worse.  Now walking like a victor you are always showing your star status that when other people see that glow in you.  Now God will always support right as long you stay right with God could never go wrong.  Each of us has a path now it up to me to try to find my path. The next step to add on my positive thinking is to find a church home.


    Today, I finally had gotten in touch with my best friend.  She finally text me back today I was so happy.  She had some misfortunes last year. I knew she could be in the dumps this time of year.  She and I have been thru thick and thin. We recently had gotten back in touch with each other after 11 years of a misunderstanding.  It’s funny how God put people back into our lives for a reason.  To be honest I thought I would never speak to her again even though she always kept in touch with my sisters.  I guess God separated us for a reason.  We both had to learn to deal with adversity and with God's help and not helping each other.   When trying to find your purpose in life or get the trash out of your life God put people in position for you to see the purpose of being positive and driven.  My best friend had her misfortunes and still went to school even though she did not have any support from her significant other who was too busy running the streets. But she was driven to finish what she stared.   Then moved to another state where she had support.  Now she is doing positive things I am proud of her for that.   God was carrying her to victory.   

Quote of the day:

It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. Long before we first heard of Christ and got our hopes up, he had his eye on us, had designs on us for glorious living, part of the overall purpose he is working out in everything and everyone--à Ephesians 1:11 (The Message)

Seeing Clearly

Yesterday, was a good day it was drama free no arguing or fussing.  However that put me into thought on how I can become a better me.  I have done a partial inventory of myself and there are some things that I need to work on. Such as helping myself and finding time for me.  Once I get over that hump I will be able to see clearly.  What am I trying to see clearly? To see myself  how I truly am and weed out all the self-destructive behaviors.  I have and replace them with more constructive behavior that are  positive, independent, and driven.   I often ask myself why I choose people who mean me no good?  Is in in my subconscious where I pick these people with certain behaviors I have seen in the past and think that is normal? These are the answer I am trying to find out about myself.  These behaviors I need to change but how to change them is a challenge. Well I know I need to change my thought process. First change is to say positive things to myself.  

My quote of the day: 

The greatest thing a human soul ever does in this world is to see something, and tell what it saw in a plain way. Hundreds of people can talk for one who can think, but thousands can think for one who can see. To see clearly is poetry, prophecy, and religion - all in one (by John Ruskin)

Finding self

The word preserving what does that mean well the Webster say:   to persist in a state, enterprise, or undertaking in spite of counterinfluences, opposition, or discouragement.   That is the predicament I have put myself in but I often as myself “How did this happen?”   Even though I keep trying to become a better me.  There are some people in my life that do not want me to succeed why is that?  That is why I am starting this blog to start a journey to victory on the things I want.  For over a decade I have been trying to conform to what other people want me to be.   I lost myself, peace of mind and self-worth, those things are important for me to hang on to.  My word for today is preserving

Victory belong to the most persevering.